My Clothes

My jeans 'fit'. I use that word loosely because while they button, I have serious muffin top. I hate it. I still wear my maternity jeans some just so I don't have muffin top. Usually when I lose 5 lbs my clothes fit better. Not right now though. I get so frustrated any time I have to get dressed. I feel gross still. I just want my damn clothes to fit now.

First Weigh In

I had my first WW weigh in today. According to their scale I was 161.1 lbs. On their scale today I was 156.6. That is a -4.6!! I was really surprised because according to my scale I had only lost 3lbs. So my scale must be off. Doesn't matter I lost weight. I was really proud of myself. I stayed for the meeting but had to leave early because E was getting upset. She was tired anyways.

I didn't get to walk today because I had the meeting and go to the store for my mom. But I got walking in, just not as much. I'll walk tomorrow. I am sticking with my 2.2 miles in the mornings. It's getting warmer so shorts are going to be worn from now on!!

10lbs until pre-prego weight!

Yesterday was the easiest day so far of eating less. I think I even had 2 points left over. I remember now that once you start to get the hang of Weight Watchers it is easier to add in 0 point or 1 point foods. We made our own fruit salad and it was yummy. Well except for the fact that husband put too much lemon juice and I winched each bite. 

I also hit my 10,000 steps again yesterday. I am getting closer each day though. I usually hit 8000-9000 steps. On Thursday when I met my friend we walked her neighborhood with lots of hills. They were hard but they felt good. AND I felt them yesterday and still some today. I attempted walking yesterday but E was getting fidgety after lap so I went home. I needed to run some errands so I could get the rest of the walking done there. 

Like the title says I am officially 10 lbs away from my pre-pregnancy weight! So far my decrease in calories has not affected my supply either. That is a big concern of decreasing calories while breastfeeding. 

Overall I feel good and I feel lighter. Though I wish I already at least fit in my jeans again without having a muffin top. 

Today we aren't going to be home much with some family and friends things we have going on. Will have to pay close attention to my food and bring my snacks with me. Adios.

thinking thinking thinking

The thing with consuming less calories for me is THINKING about how I can't eat whatever I want. I think about food way more than I did when I could eat whatever. This I know is part of my alcoholic mind. I know my thinking is different but I am sure others can relate to a sort of obsession of thinking about food when you can't have it. When you first get sober you think about alcohol a lot. I mean it was what you looked forward to, what your body wanted and when you don't get it anymore well you tend to obsess. I know I have that with food on some level. There are Overeaters Anonymous meetings but I like my AA program. I have no desire to do another 12 steps for eating.

I know why Weight Watchers gives nursing moms 14 extra points...because we are still sooooo effing hungry!! I would only get 26 points not nursing but with only breastfeeding I get 40! I use them all too! Today has been hard hunger wise.

It was unseasonably cold this morning so I didn't walk when I normally do. I waited until about 3pm which made it a crisp 52 degrees. I walked 2.09 miles. The last .2 was with a baby in my arms. E got upset at the end so I carried her the part. It was hard. I wish I got extra points or steps for CARRYING a baby. I am walking with my friend tomorrow morning. We are going to breakfast after that. I went ahead and looked at their menu so I could plan ahead what I was going to order. Yay for planning.

My weakness is sweets. I love Dr. Pepper too. I found the smaller tiny cans of the regular Dr. Pepper so I can still have my fix. I should buy a few Diet Cokes too. Diet Coke is 0 WW points.

The Weekend & Weight Watchers

My husband took G & C camping this weekend. I went out there during the day for a few hours. I was excited because I thought I would be out there long enough to get my 10,000 steps in. I got my fitbit in the mail last Monday and had yet to get 10,000 steps, which is the recommended amounts of steps everyone is supposed to do per day. I failed at getting that many steps in either day. I was disappointed because we went on a nature walk and just stood around the camp site. I finally got my 10,000 steps in yesterday. That included a 1.78 mile walk with E, laundry, cleaning the house, and the still walking ~700 steps in the house just to get over the 10,000 mark! I was tired. I will work my way up to more walking with E though. She enjoys the walks and usually falls asleep.

I took a picture of myself in my new swimsuit. I haven't bought a swimsuit since 2007. And it covered my stomach. This does not. Oy! I am not happy with how I look. But I
am working on it.

 

In the beginning

There are a million blogs out there where people are documenting their weight loss. I am just one in a sea of blogs but that is okay because this my journey. This is my record. I haven't had a blog, and open blog, in a couple of years. Even if no one ever reads this it will still be my words and my experience.

A little about me. I am 31 year old  from Oklahoma but have resided in Texas for 10 years. I am a wife to a crazy/super cool husband & mother to 3 beautiful children. I am a stay at home mom, recovering alcoholic (sober 3 years), and creator of crafts. My kiddos: G is 6 and in the 1st grade, C is 4 and in preschool, and E is 7 weeks old. E is part of the reason I am loosing weight. After G, I lost all by 10lbs of my baby weight. After C, I lost all of the baby weight but still had the 10lbs from G. Currently I am 159 lbs. I gained 34lbs with E. I was up to 179. My goal weight is 130. It is where I am comfortable. I haven't been 130 since about 2007.

What am I doing to loose weight? I am a runner but it's not possible for me to run right now. So I walk. I bought a fitbit and it's a great motivator. I am starting Weight Watchers on Tuesday. I would rather change my food ways than working out a lot. I have always done well on Weight Watchers so I am excited to start. Plus I like the meetings even though I don't say anything. It reminds me a lot of AA meetings. The reason I chose this name for my blog is because right now I don't have much love for my body. I feel gross. My clothes don't fit very well and I refuse to buy new clothes. The AA meeting on Tuesday was about Love and Tolerance of myself. I want to love my body even if I am not at my goal weight yet. I really do not like this picture of myself and I have never put a picture like this of myself on the internet. But here goes. Here is the before picture: